26 September 2016

Paint it White

It takes courage to contradict to the world's greatest rock band. But this week, I did. Following recent renovations, we had painters in the house, and no room was left to ambiguity: Paint it White.

In Québec, this is not as obvious a decision as I had hoped, for the province combines both exuberant Latin style and North American taste for gaudiness. This leads to many walls, both on the inside and the outside of homes, being painted in ghastly shades of color. Whereas my no-nonsense Germanic taste is for the clean and pure, that is not the norm in the belle province: She's a Rainbow.

If not the entire province, then at the very least I had to convince the better half of a timeless color which does Not Fade Away. White makes rooms seem larger, brighter, more modern and more calm. Why would you want your walls to be in any other color? I don't want my home to be a disco, but to Gimme Shelter.

Love is Strong, and it is not as if I wasn't willing to compromise. Any of a 147 shades of white would be fine, whether it is "Roman Column", "First Star" or even the mysteriously named "Swiss Coffee". But she still had Mixed Emotions.

So before long, we were off to a place where I came close to my 19th Nervous Breakdown: The DIY wonderland that is Home Depot, where tools and appliances pile high into the sky and the home improvement-averse are overwhelmed endless aisles of intimidating gear. My head started spinning, and while she headed straight to the section with the paint samples, I strayed into the lands of piping, floor tiles and kitchen sinks. Soon I was lost. Anybody Seen My Baby?

Luckily, we found both the exit and compromise, because You Can't Always Get What You Want. One wall of our office would be blue (but not turning to grey). The painters moved in, did as they were told, and after a day or two of Ventilator Blues, the paint has dried and our house is now resplendent with brightness.

It's All Over Now, and it is mostly white. At last, I got my Satisfaction.

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